$.75, please.

I was about to write a post about how I was actually doing something about my vague New Year’s Resolution to “be healthier.”

Instead I went to the vending machine and got a big grab Cool Ranch Doritos.

So, looks like I’m going to have to work a little harder on the whole “healthy” thing. I signed up for a gym membership today. I spent the last half of my lunch break exploring the world that I paid to enter. My exploring (sans map, mind you) did not result in any calories burned, instead resulted in me getting myself lost and barely making it to work on time. In a 3 story building, who puts the pool on the top floor? That’s all I’m saying.

I did start last week strong, drinking the (mythical) magic number of 64 oz. of water. This week I’m on two cokes a day and “WINE, Bring Me Wine” when I get home at night. Something has gone bad wrong in these last two days of healthy pursuits.

Sinus pressure. That’s what’s gone bad wrong. I’ve never been able to feel my pulse in the bridge of my nose before today. At one point, I yawned while simultaneously getting an invisible ice pick jabbed into my right ear. I’d say braving the driving winds of North Texas to make it all the way to the Rec Center is ‘good enough’ for my daily exercise today, thankyouverymuch. Besides, I’m clearly an after-work-worker-outer. None of this “healthy during lunch” business for me. Lunch is for being UNhealthy. After work is the prime time for making up for the bad, cool ranch flavored choices that I made all day long.