The following is an actual text message conversation between the Mrs and me. It occurred recently when I was out and about at a late hour, and she was not.
Me: You awake?
Sarah: Still jaw with here.
Sarah: Jawing with nothing in the nurses.
At this point in time, I made the decision to call her, because despite the obvious disconnect in that I had absolutely no idea what she was talking about, her response did in fact verify that yes, she was awake.
Me: Hey, now that I know you’re awake, is everything okay? And what does ‘Still jaw with here’ mean?
Sarah: You know, jawing.
Me: No, I don’t know! Where are you?
Sarah: At the hospital.
Me: At the hospital? Why are you there? Is something wrong?
Sarah: It’s today at the hospital.
Me (becoming more concerned): What happened? What hospital are you at?
Sarah: I’m not there now.
Me: Okay, where are you now? Why were you at the hospital? And are you on medication or something?
Sarah: I’m safe. I’m at your family’s house.
Me: And you weren’t at the hospital?
Me: Are you drunk?
Me: Okay. I’ll let you sleep it off. I love you.
Since then I’ve done my best to figure out what sort of texting auto-predict malfunction occurred during our strange conversation, but for the life of me I cannot decipher what she was trying to say. Ultimately though, despite her protests to the contrary, she wanted to say ‘jawing.’ Once is a mistake, twice is intentional.
In the words of a former president, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice…..don’t get fooled again.”
Thank you George W. Thank you Sarah. God Bless America!
Post Script – Sarah claims to have been sleep-drunk. Sure, Sarah. Keep jawing on that one!